The Fedora Must Die

by Dax-Devlon Ross

Dear Fedora,

I’m afraid that your time has come

I know

You feel you just got here

Are are just getting started

But you’ve already peaked

Your best days are behind you

And now it is time to meet an immediate and

Abrupt

Demise.

You must be swiftly rounded up from every Banana Republic, Old Navy, Hollister, Target, Walmart

And guy on the corner,

If need be

You must be forcibly removed

From the heads of Hipsters,

Hipster hopefuls,

Mad Men wise asses,

People looking to make safe style statements without effort or risk,

And anyone else who thinks it’s okay to follow a fad and not call themselves a follower.

You

Ed Hardy

Crocks,

Uggs,

Trucker Hat,

All of you must go!

Do not dally

Do not bow

Just

Go

Away

Now.

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